copyright (c) 2020 Tabitha Carin Snowden
2020
Why Sex
Before Marriage Is Not Good
Sex before
marriage is tempting, because it is a natural flesh desire God put in our
lives, although He did not intend on it being premarital. It’s a hard
circumstance a lot of people are dealing with, and have been for a very long
time. It’s a very common thing now days, to live together and have premarital
sex, without blinking twice about it; we have come so immune to it, so it must
be OK right…? Wrong. The bible has never changed, ever, the people reading the
bible have, we have changed our thoughts or convictions everything, and
we think the bible has changed? No, the bible has not, the commandments God wants us to live by, we are forgetting… It isn’t
right to watch porn, it isn’t right to cheat on someone, it isn’t right be mean
and critical to people, it’s not right have sex before marriage.
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Mark 10:6-9 says; “But from the beginning of creation, ‘God made them male and female.’ ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife,[a] 8 and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh. 9 What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”
Hold fast, to his wife, it does not say his
girlfriend, it does not say his fiancée, but WIFE!
It is important to remember the scriptures and
to not forget what they say, they tell us everything we need to know, nowhere
in the bible says that it is alright to have sex before marriage. So how do we
twist it around to make it OK? Where do we find the guidance to make those
decisions? We choose to ignore the scriptures that are actually teaching us, or
preaching to us, because who likes to feel convicted!?! The truth is; God
didn’t give us the Word to make us feel all comfortable and perfect, He gave it
to us to feel constantly uncomfortable, to feel constantly convicted. To be in
a constant place of growing and breaking and remolding, because we will never
reach perfection, we shouldn’t want to, because there is always something to be
learned from the Word of God.
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1
Thessalonians 4:3-4; “It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you
should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control
your own body in a way that is holy and honorable.” Avoid sexual
immorality; which means to avoid temptations that end in bad results, such
as sin, and that is a challenge, but it is a challenge we must take on. Also
take control of your own body, yes it is possible to take control of ourselves,
we can do such things, it is important to realize that if we don’t take control
we will make life long mistakes, and God doesn’t want to see us making
mistakes. What father likes to see his children mess up? No father likes to see
that, God doesn’t want to see us hurt, and sin often leads to hurt.
AG.org says
in one of their articles and premarital sex; “In terms of marital
satisfaction, one of the most widespread modern myths is that couples need to
live together before they get married to see if they are sexually compatible
and thus to enhance future marital health and satisfaction. In reality,
research shows that couples who live together before marriage have higher
infidelity rates and lower marital satisfaction rates than those who do not
live together before marriage.” It is a myth; you do not need to live together
before marriage, it’s unnecessary, God made man and woman to be married to be
unified and not to be living in sin. That is why He made marriage in the first
place, to come together in our ups and downs, and to learn with each other, the exciting things of marriage are to learn!! But often we want to
figure it all out before we even get to the place of marriage.
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This article was well written by Steven Tracy posted on
Ag.org says this; “Other New Testament passages affirm the fact that
pre-marital sex is forbidden. One of the clearest examples is in 1 Cor 7:1-5,
where Paul responds to the Corinthians' suggestion that it is best for a
married man to not have sexual relations with his wife. Paul's response is that
because of immoralities (porneia), each man should have sexual relations with
his own wife, and the husband and wife must meet each other's sexual needs so
that they do not fall into sexual temptation. There is no moral loophole here
for pre-marital sex, for Paul instead argues that marriage is the only God
ordained provision for sexual needs. Other passages such as Heb 13:4 link those
who practice pre-marital sex with adulterers, indicating that sex before
marriage and sex after marriage to someone other than one's spouse are equally
condemned ("God will judge"). The marriage bed is cited as the
exclusive place for God ordained sexual activity.”
Paul tells us that it is OK to have sexual relations with our spouses, but it is immoral to have sexual relations outside of marriage. Marriage is holy and God given thing, and God also gave us sex, but we often confuse the two, and we shouldn’t because in the bible it states many times clearly; that it is a sin.
Paul tells us that it is OK to have sexual relations with our spouses, but it is immoral to have sexual relations outside of marriage. Marriage is holy and God given thing, and God also gave us sex, but we often confuse the two, and we shouldn’t because in the bible it states many times clearly; that it is a sin.
“The reasons for cohabitation's negative
effect are not fully understood. One may be that while marriages are held
together largely by a strong ethic of commitment, cohabiting relationships by
their very nature tend to undercut this ethic. Although cohabiting
relationships are like marriages in many ways-shared dwelling, economic union
(at least in part), sexual intimacy, often even children-they typically differ
in the levels of commitment and autonomy involved. According to recent
studies cohabitants tend not to be as committed as married couples in their
dedication to the continuation of the relationship and reluctance to terminate
it, and they are more oriented toward their own personal autonomy.7 It
is reasonable to speculate, based on these studies, that once this
low-commitment, high-autonomy pattern of relating is learned, it becomes hard
to unlearn.” Once you learn a way of life, it is very hard to unlearn it,
realizing that you could get yourself stuck in a position that is not biblical,
and it could hurt you and others for the rest of your life!
We live in a society that sees premarital sex
as OK, the world doesn’t see the problem, if we get told something or are
telling ourselves something even if it’s not true, we start believe it is. That
happens when we let our core get corrupted, if we don’t have a strong core in
our faith, it’s easier to let the wrong information in, and eventually being
weak to sin. It’s not easy all the time, but studying the bible and prayer, and
staying in the Lord’s presence, the temptation will fade.
Focus on the Family wrote an article about
how important marriage is in this situation; “In
other words, marriage involves a couple’s public commitment to build a strong
and lasting relationship.That relationship isn’t only a foundation for the
nurturing of their own children; it’s also a building block of social stability
and a contribution to the well-being of the broader community.”
Focusing on the stability
and love and having a Christ-centered relationship, that is what is truly
important, that will help to keep temptation away. Always press in to the Word
of God, the scriptures speak for themselves, they don’t need any help, they
tell us what is wrong and what is right. It’s clear the Lord just wants what is
best for us, so if we follow His words, there won’t be as many consequences
such as premarital sex, or other sins.
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1 Corinthians 6:18-20 “ Flee sexual immorality. Every sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own? For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s.”
Flee from
sexual immorality, because you not only sinning against God, you are also
hurting your own body, because like it says in the scripture our bodies are a
temple of the Holy Spirit. Keep your body Holy, like God created, because God
didn’t create us to destroy ourselves, but to thrive in His Word and His
presence.
If you are
thinking about having premarital sexual relations with someone, maybe it’s
someone you love, remember the Word of God, God created marriage and sex, in
that order, not the other way around. The first unit He created for male and
female was marriage, that is how important it is to Him, we can’t confuse what
God already set in place for our lives. If you love someone that much, remember
how the more special it will be to share that moment with your spouse, how it
will bring you together, and the two shall become one.
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Cites;
